“Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the face”, is one of Mike Tyson’s most famous quotes, however it is not the full quote. The part, “Then, like a rat, they stop in fear and freeze”, often gets left out, however it is really the most telling part, as it brings home most people’s response when getting punched for the first time, and stresses the importance of being the one to make the first strike – even if it is simply a disrupting, rather than a concussive, strike, punch or blow. Anecdotally, I would say that in 8 to 9, out of 10 violent altercations I’ve witnessed (mainly whilst working bar/door security), the individual who threw the first punch came out of the fight in better shape than the other party. In most cases, such fights were over in 5, and at the top end 10 seconds, as the party that was hit emotionally crumbled and took themselves out of the fight – it wasn’t that they were physically incapable of continuing, they just didn’t want to, and so curled up, backed away, and/or crawled away, etc. Although, this has started to change, it used to be that they were generally allowed to do so, with maybe a token kick to send them on their way. The fights that lasted a long time, were usually (but not exclusively) between people who knew each other, where there was some long-running perceived injustice/score that needed to be settled. In this article I want to look at what it’s like to be punched, and why it’s generally advisable to be the one throwing the first punch/strike.
I’ve been punched in the face. It’s happened to me in real-life (both as a child and an adult) and it happens regularly when I spar/train – a constant reminder to improve and get better. I can never stress enough the difference between being punched in a controlled training environment and in real-life. Sparring doesn’t fully condition you for the real-life experience. Most punches you take to the face in a real-life encounter are sloppy strikes; sometimes somebody will land a solid punch, but most times this isn’t the case – despite the number of videos of one punch knockouts that do the rounds on social media that would seem to contradict this. It is not the pain of getting punched, that causes people to freeze, it’s the shock, and a realization that nothing could prepare you for this moment.
Sparring is consensual and to varying degrees - depending on rules and partner’s – controlled. Real-life violence is non-consensual, with no rules, and no predetermined and agreed-upon outcome that signals that the fight should end. When you get punched for the first time, this realization is startling, and often paralyzing. Whatever social and moral conventions that you believed society was governed by have been thrown out of the window by an individual who – in that moment - has no respect for them and doesn’t believe they apply to them. The world you have just entered is not a familiar one. Even if you have experience of fighting in a ring or a cage, such training may prepare you for the physical experience, (which is a good head-start) however it won’t by default fully prepare you for the psychological and emotional part. The pain part isn’t usually what overwhelms the individual, it’s their new understanding of what the world looks like in that moment and how unprepared they are to deal with it. All the laws, social conventions, and agencies that allow us to stay safe in our everyday life, aren’t present in this moment, and that’s a frightening realization, that most people get caught up in when the first punch lands; people shouldn’t and shouldn’t be allowed to do that, but they are, and nobody is going to stop them. If they’ve broken this convention, what others are they going to break? Are they going to pull a weapon? Are their friends going to join in? And so, the mind gets flooded with these questions and others, as second, third, fourth punches rain in; and once your assailant gets a rhythm going it can be very difficult to interrupt it. This is one of the reasons that it is usually a good idea to be the one doing it to the other person, rather than having it done to you i.e. be the one to punch/strike first.
The US legal system allows you the right to strike/punch preemptively. However, you will have to be able to articulate the reasons why you are doing this, if you are claiming self-defense. It is worth remembering that when you make a claim of self-defense, you are at the same time admitting that you acted violently and used physical force; you are simply justifying your use of violence. Some people are still under the notion that the Criminal Justice System operates in the same way as the school system did when we were growing up: that whoever threw the first punch is the guilty party and should be punished. This is not the case. For an assault to occur, your assailant doesn’t even need to touch you (when contact is made, that is “battery”), all they have to do is give you a reason to fear for your safety, and put themselves in a position, where they are at a distance from which they can make contact with you. If these conditions are met, you are entitled to defend yourself, and this includes making the first strike/punch. When working door/bar security, the first thing I used to do when dealing with a verbally aggressive individual, was to step back, and bring my hands up (palms down – so my fingers were protected), in a placating manner. From a professional perspective, one reason for this was to “gather witnesses”, so if anything went legal, I had people who had seen me step away, and put my hands up in a placating manner, etc. From here I would start my de-escalation/conflict resolution processes, however if the person stepped towards me aggressively, I will have demonstrated by my body language and movement – to those around me, who are witnessing and might be filming – that I feared for my safety, and that my aggressor had moved to a position where they could cause me physical harm. Their movement towards me, would usually be the trigger that would cause me to act pre-emptively – by and large my first strike would usually be to just get a hand into the other person’s face to disrupt them, and then whatever would follow would be dependent on the context of the situation e.g. whether I would follow up with strikes, or go for some control or takedown, etc.
Fighting is about one person acting violently towards another, and it is important to turn the tables in a real-life encounter, so that it is you attacking the other individual, rather than the other way around. This may seem to go against the very nature of self-defense, however the most effective way of defending yourself is to not allow your aggressor to have an opportunity to make an attack, by pre-emptively overwhelming them. If you have as your goal the idea of only engaging to create a safe disengagement opportunity, it is unlikely that you will be judged to have used excessive force; it’s when you stay longer than you need to, that these types of question get asked, which is why implementing “stun and run” strategies are usually the most effective, from both a personal safety and legal perspective.