There is an over-focus in the martial arts and in many self-defense systems on physicality and the techniques needed to “answer” that physicality e.g., if someone pushes me, how do I negate and/or counter that push etc. The emotional content, the behavioral aspects, behind the push are rarely examined or even considered when looking at defenses to it. I’m at heart a traditional martial artist. I love watching YouTube videos of Aikidoka, Judoka and Karate practitioners demonstrating clean techniques i.e., the arts side of the martial arts. I also believe that many Krav Maga practitioners and instructors would benefit from embracing this type of practice. I see many videos where the demonstration of an aggressive response occurs at the expense of “form” e.g., a supposedly forceful strike is made whilst the corresponding stepping foot is still in the air, rather than timed to land with the strike etc., however because the person performing the strike is shouting/looking/acting aggressively etc., we are meant to ignore this. Aggression and good form can and should exist together; they are not binary alternatives. However, in saying all of this, when it comes to training for reality, often a piece that is lacking is knowing how to defend against the rage of an attack, i.e., the emotion behind it, and this is perhaps where most trained individuals fail when it comes to dealing with real-life violence.
I was bullied as a kid. Not picked on but bullied. I wouldn’t say everyone in the group that bullied me hated me, some just went along with it, because it was easy, entertaining, and it allowed them to be part of the group as opposed to potentially being an outsider who may then be a target. However, the two main protagonists in the group hated me with a degree of venom that was hard to understand as a child. It took me awhile to realize that these weren’t individuals who could be won over, that if they just got to know me, we could all be friends etc. My guess is, that unless they’ve had a come to Jesus moment in their lives, they still hate me to this day (forty plus years on). This experience of violence gave me an early introduction to the rage behind the physical acts committed against me. A push wasn’t just a push, a punch wasn’t just a punch etc., every physical act was an expression of anger, hatred and rage. However, it was an education that served me well in my time working on the door.
I started working on the door in pub/bar/club security when I was eighteen. The Judo club I trained at whilst I was at university basically provided the doormen for the city’s drinking establishments, and to cut a long story short, I ended up working for one of the companies that provided these security services. There are few angrier more hostile people than those who are looking to have a drink and are refused the opportunity to do so. If someone has been having a good night, with their friends, and are told that they can’t come into an establishment – perhaps because of a restriction in numbers due to a fire code, or because they’re wearing sneakers/trainers rather than shoes and they’re violating the dress code etc. Top tip: don’t try the argument that the sneakers/trainers you’re wearing cost $500 more than the guy who has just been let in before you and is wearing a pair of shoes that cost $30 etc., because if you think you’re the first person to make this “clever” argument, you’re not, and you won’t be let in. In fact, if you start arguing with a doorman you’re not coming in that night, and possibly not ever in the future. The one thing that prepared me for dealing with angry individuals was that I was not only trained to defend the physical attacks and assaults that may have been directed at me, but I knew how to defend against the anger and rage that fueled them. However, I have worked with many very physically competent people who took a long time to learn how to deal with this.
Big guys often go through their life without being bullied and picked on. There are those that do, but many don’t, and sometimes they end up working on the door. It’s always useful to have big people around when you need to control someone. However, many of them, when they first start working, haven’t experienced someone else’s anger, hatred and rage. It’s an emotionally new experience for them, and one that initially catches many of them unaware i.e., why would someone who isn’t let in start attacking them because they’re a different race, because of their haircut etc. They might be great at defending themselves physically, but they didn’t know how to defend themselves against the rage and hatred demonstrated, especially when the rage may not have, from a professional perspective, justified a physical response.
A lot of Krav Maga training teaches responses to “physical surprise” e.g., someone catching you in a rear strangle when you’re not expecting it etc. The fact that Krav Maga has an “unprepared stance” as one of its stances, recognizes that we will not always be physically prepared to deal with an attack/assault, however there is often little time spent dealing with “psychological/emotional surprise” i.e., how do you respond and manage when someone is screaming in your face and calling you every name under the sun. I would argue that you are more likely to have to deal with an “emotional” surprise than a “physical” one, and if your training hasn’t included this then you’ll be less likely to a) put into play a de-escalation process and/or b) employ the appropriate physical solution/response that you learnt in class. Most violence occurs due to normal social interactions that have gone bad, and they are usually motivated/accompanied by rage and hatred. If you haven’t learnt how to defend against the rage, you are likely to simply freeze. Next time you practice a rear strangle defense when physically surprised add in an “emotional” surprise e.g., have someone shouting and swearing in your ear as you practice your defense etc.